depictions by the rule of thirds; descriptions mostly freestyle words
my analyst would have seen a green light
– were it a watery dream;
leaping fish in a passion’s swell
a deep-sea dive over the dam
but it was no waking fancy
Autumn rain, shoals of glitter-ball
frantically feeling a way to the sea;
how still we stood, in thrall to it all
the storm that sent us sheltering there
beat the boundary walls
water everywhere like the poem, a hymn
to land lovers far from peril in the deep
breathing to a two-stroke rhythm
no occasion for snorkel or scuba tank
safe in the aquarium
Polaroid poems – a developing theme of nostalgia with a light-touch and a hint of a smile on past events, real or imagined
– to join with the versifying at Poetry Pantry
It seems to me like the aquarium is a metaphor for a rationalized past….
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and as it was not dream – the present perhaps too?!
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This is soo intriguing..!! I must try this some time 😀
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the format sets the mood – and here’s how I make them
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What a wonderful idea -Polaroid poem – the words and image really submerged us in that setting..a brief..magical moment captured in time
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perceptive as always Jae Rose – thank you
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a beautiful setting indeed..”..shoals of glitter-ball / frantically feeling a way to the sea;”..love this…
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thank you Sumana – their movements are both sparkling and maniacal – lovely to watch but also witnessing some distress it seems
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beautiful imagery.
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❤
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We all live in our aquariums yet pity the fish as at Bournemouth! Freedom is relative to the captivity we enjoy. Perhaps this is why we do dangerous things.
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frying pan to fire comes to mind – interesting comment
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Your poem submerged me in thought,Laura. One to dive into and look at life from a place of safety inside that aquarium! A very interesting form.
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thank you Mary for your aquatic views!
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This is an intriguing form, indeed. I especially love “in thrall to it all”, and the vivid imagery.
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wasn’t sure of that double rhyme Sherry so thank you!
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I love that aquarium paradox–the surround of water–and rain as well–and yet total safety and therefore enthrallment. It is an amazing photo!
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looking for that place between the outside and the inside of the glass box – astute comment Susan – thank you
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Love the form Laura…intriguing metaphor that aquarium….perhaps it is a safe place but a trap as well…I think I would be diving over the dam.
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the protagonist has many fears Donna – beyond the dam is the great unknown! 🙂
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I like the dream like language that portrays a non-dream. Wonderfully fluid with great imagery,
Elizabeth
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– thank you for this summation – it’s what I aimed for but could not have put it so fluidly
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This felt like a dream. The therapist, the water, the nostalgia, the danger, then the safety of the fish tank. I like the form. It seems like it mixes reality with some humor.
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thank you – the light touch of a smile will keep these retrospectives from being too dark
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i was thinking about a present storm – literally / figuratively.
is bournemouth in UK? i’ve been to bournemouth once – i liked the place and blog about it before.
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the storm is a good metaphor -real or imaginary. And yes Bournemouth is on our Southcoast – literally means mouth of the river (bourne)
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A literal trip being analyzed, I think that would interesting to see.
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a thin veil between the waking and the dream world I imagine!
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for those in peril …
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indeed – a favourite hymn with an undertow of fear of water!
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