PoetryPix
depictions by the rule of thirds; descriptions mostly freestyle words
mind the gap
you with such profound presence have surely gone
an imprint of invisibility remains at large
a vacancy so vivid, so self-evident
it has punched the air
did you leave that way, one fisted,
one hand waving free?*
mimicking the gap, my mouth agape
memories a broken mosaic, missing parts
stories told so many times the lines jumble
with ballads that fifties folk once passed around
some scenes though still freshly painted as a warm September
martin and swallow swarms at the brink of the sea
scything late-hatched insects that cloud our heads
We circled with the birds, dizzied by dashing displays
and in those spellbound moments, your soul migrated
returning home was almost aftermath, a brief touch down
before you found your way – I’m making headway now
through the hole, a crawl to the other side of beyond
– of course, I’ll mind the gap
*a nod to Dylan’s ‘Tambourine Man’ was just so apt
A last poem until I make my move and joining others in Poetry Pantry
21 Comments on “mind the gap”
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This is very beautiful. Such imagery.
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thank you Jude -some memories still so very visual
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I agree with Heyjude – beautiful writing. Making headway is a good thing!
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yes it is time I too left – thank you for your appreciation mary
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There is such deep and intense emotion in this poem that is palpable and compels the reader to feel with the depths of his soul! I clutched my heart at; “mimicking the gap, my mouth agape memories a broken mosaic,”.. sending love and light your way, Laura 💜💜
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receiving them loud and clear with thanks Sanaa
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The thought of a gap is something that works so well… I can feel an inner turmoil projected against a backdrop of nature… maybe seeing it might close some gaps
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About to see it as I make my move this week
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Terrific imagery of the last journey…
did you leave that way, one fisted,
one hand waving free?… beautiful writing!
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Thank you
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I like the way you have taken an everyday phrase familiar to Londoners and given it a new meaning, Laura. ‘Mind the gap’ can be a warning or a gentle reminder, so the title seemed ambiguous until I had read and digested the whole poem, especially the lines:
‘an imprint of invisibility remains at large
a vacancy so vivid, so self-evident
it has punched the air’.
The final stanza is especially moving and I appreciate the wordplay in:
‘… a brief touch down
before you found your way – I’m making headway now
through the hole…’
Is this really your last poem? I hope not. Much love x
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Just last poem as I leave London and hence will mind the gap Kim
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🙂
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loved the lovely and intense imagery here.
i feel like i have been crawling around in a hole lately, and i can relate to this. 🙂
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Looking for a way out and now have found it
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a vacancy so vivid… it punches the air. – and you are on a similar journey? Last poem… until ?
Awesome writing.
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Until I settle in new home and get connected
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Startling images – and yet so right. All the very best for your journeying and new locale.
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thank you Rosemary – a pilgrim soul finding her way alone
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Are you remembering the day when you wrote – something like – an achievement to walk the prom – which was mystifying when I read it. But made sadly clear in your following posts.
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almost Diana – a walk we made to Pegwell Bay – yes an achievement too and mesmerised by migrating swallows
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