Hope for the Fatalist

“…in a lifetime, when do a child’s dreams ignite?

Once-in-a-lifetime -- How compact
How now-or-never and I the little fatalist
too literal, missed the specialness
heard it only as a door slammed shut
a visitor left on the welcome mat
open-mouthed. Or felt the rush of sash
windows, in free fall, when the cord frays
Can't you hear its all about luck and loss?
I cried over all lost things. My grey wool gloves
missing that winter of '59. Saint Anthony
recovering them in June, Too late -
the moment passed. Hope so readily bruised
when faith, its foundation, fractures, falling
like hail on psyche, mawkish and make-believe

But because nothing is just once and forever
(except birth, and then death of course)
I grew into a lifespan of unfastened doors
windows held up too, on outlooks
often w i d e r
fresher
clearer
than I could ever hope for

and in my dressing table drawer
(where Saint Anthony hears the forager's prayer)
there are winter gloves galore

though none are grey.