You went darkly into the night before me,
I shadow, a daughter of the son-of-the-sea,
And slip on the tails of your spectres-glee.
This scorpion-girl speaks your water-spoken tale,
Churns through blue-marls, surface broken,
Seeking Aegir through ethereal veil.
I, the she-bird, dive deep into tide-looped motion,
Lark-high then down-low with ebb of breath,
I plunge wholly into my namesakes ocean.
Unrelenting, malice-free, your sea story is bound to me,
Bound by both times-spell and waters cradle,
The wave, the tide-turning timepiece, is never free.
In your dark days you’d call deaths name, then falter,
As it stirred in the depths of your anguished ocean, that rose,
and fell like the moon-blown breast on our aching alter.
Gone now are you, gone from these mountain streams,
That still sing and babble your word-drunk dreams,
And carry you through tear-culled valleys,
Gently into the night, son-of-the-sea, at ease.
A poem by Catherine Thomas. Summoning her Welsh roots, my daughter Catherine [Catrin] has joined my Tuesday Poetics Challenge: Love the Words – using at least 4 word compounds that Dylan Thomas employed.
The title speaks volumes and I’d not known the meaning of ‘Dylan’ til now. Setting aside any maternal bias, I am rather overwhelmed by Catherine’s understanding of the poet’s writing, the turbulent emotions with sea as metaphor and the way she has woven his word compounds with her own.
Some of my favourite lines:
“I, the she-bird, dive deep into tide-looped motion,
Lark-high then down-low with ebb of breath,
I plunge wholly into my namesakes ocean.”
Thank you Mum for this poetry challenge, I really enjoyed ‘having a go’.
Thank you everyone for your lovely and encouraging comments, I have been very touched by your feedback and have decided to create a blog and try and find my inner “expression. I look forward to sharing.
I’ve enjoyed reading all of your Love the Words
Contributions too which have left me feeling inspired and slightly in awe.
I especially like this stanza and the image it portrays:
“I, the she-bird, dive deep into tide-looped motion,
Lark-high then down-low with ebb of breath,
I plunge wholly into my namesakes ocean.”
snap!
I was really impressed by this… from the first word I heard Dylan’s famous Villanelle “don’t go gently… “, in the background… maybe later when rage has mellowed into sorrow this is what’s felt. The compound words work so seamlessly to express such a sorrow.
I agree Bjorn – it is the seamless melding ( and subtle rhymes) that makes the poem read so well – Catherine chose to go with the inverse of his famous Villanelle
A far kinder closure than
rage, against the dying of the light.
Thomas I think was summoning his father to a struggle against his oncoming death -but I agree, Catherine’s poem goes gently there at the end
Very impressive poem, the rhythm and ebb and flow of the ocean. I felt so moved by this part:
In your dark days you’d call deaths name, then falter,
As it stirred in the depths of your anguished ocean, that rose,
and fell like the moon-blown breast on our aching alter.
Kindly extend our thanks to your daughter for writing and sharing such a moving poem. A gem to read tonight.
great feedback and a very touching comment Grace and one that will further encourage Catherine to start her own blog writings -and maybe even join us at dVerse sometimes!
Reading those lines in isolation I can almost hear Leonard Cohen, a mis-spent youth!
Better a mis spent youth than one on loan!
I love this line: “I shadow …And slip on the tails of your spectres-glee.” Deep like the sea.
Indeed! Great depth – and I liked that line too – the notion of slipping with overtones of seaweed and the glee that Dylan Thomas had in his lighter moments
Yes indeed. Your daughter’s a good poet. Do you think she will write more for dVerse?
What a very encouraging comment – surely she will now she has her own site too
🙂
and i release a deep sigh, as deep as this poetic sea with waves of verbing. ❤
ah yes ‘the waves of verbing’ – well said ❤
thank you, Laura!
Beautiful Catherine! Wonderful use of compound words… sad ending, but full of love!
Well deserved but generous words Rob – much appreciated