The Stranger’s heart

1-memories
© Ljg photoart

Worlds apart
Heard voices in each other’s head
Tongue tied is the stranger’s heart

Face to face they spoke of art
The mongrel and the thoroughbred
Worlds apart

A feverish chart
Two moist dots kept an invalid bed
Tongue tied is the stranger’s heart

Belle lettres folded like a dart
Telling beads on a blooded thread
Worlds apart

A fearful start
Guardian angels with their worn out tread
Tongue tied is the stranger’s heart

When Eve disturbed the apple cart
Lovers flung themselves unwed
Worlds apart
Tongue tied is the stranger’s heart

At DVerse this week Frank throws down what has almost been a challenge too far for me as he shows us how to write a villanelle

19 thoughts on “The Stranger’s heart

    1. really appreciate your comment as each stanza was a struggle – thank you ❤

  1. While reading this I imagine two people who are very different, “worlds apart”, and yet somehow communicating though strangers. The details fill in some of the questions. I wonder are these two sharing a room in a hospital because of the “feverish chart” and “invalid” one with a book of “belles letres” and the other with a rosary. I liked the lines: “Telling beads on a blooded thread” and “When Eve disturbed the apple cart
    Lovers flung themselves unwed”. Very nice.

    1. thank you Frank for the challenge and interesting interpretation. They are perhaps both a love sick couple and strangers to each other. I kept the rhymes simple as I had to focus hard on format! Must try Villanelle a few more times to get the hang of it

  2. Cleverly crafted! I like your variations on metre and line lengths.

    1. oh thank you Rosemary – had to keep the brevity of the first lines in repetition but I struggled with the constraints of rhyme

    1. Thanks for that Björn- I see now how I dealt with the constraints of rhyme in this difficult format

  3. Love the shortened verses (worlds apart) but still keeping the rhyming pattern for the villanelle ~
    This is my favorite part:

    Belle lettres folded like a dart
    Telling beads on a blooded thread
    Worlds apart

    A fearful start

  4. I enjoued this! It says just enough that we can sort of insert ourselves into some of these scenarios. I especially liked this line: “Guardian angels with their worn out tread.”

    1. re-worked that line a bit to avoid the Forster title – still unsure so thank you

  5. One could feel the emotion and passion in two hearts yet ‘Tongue tied is the stranger’s heart’. I love the way you’ve used the form.

  6. “Guardian angels with their worn out tread” — how I love this line! We ask so much of our guardian angels….this line really points that out. Worlds apart are these two, the mongrel and the thoroughbred. Tough tough form — you’ve done well by it!

    1. Oh yes and we tread where they would fear to go! Thanks for your encouraging words Lilian

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